I love taking Danny places. That sounds like I am his mother and I own him, and actually the reason I love it so much is because he is still experiencing American-type things for the first time, not unlike a small child. Although he doesn't throw tantrums (usually...unless we're in Anthro). Where am I even going with this?
I thought it would be appropriate to compile the following list:
Things Danny Did Not Experience Until He Met Maddie and Consequently Moved to America
Kegs. Keggers. This is very American. People outside the US associate America with American Pie, which they then associate with keggers. They are usually delighted to hear that we do use red Solo cups to drink beer. When we went to a friend's cabin recently and Danny saw a keg in the garage next to a stack of red cups, he pulled me aside excitedly, "Are we at a keg party right now?!"
Keg stands. This follows #2, naturally. He almost threw up.
Chipotle, maple bars, corn dogs, in that order.
Beef jerky. Danny says beef jerky is for cowboys, which is why he initially bought a pack of it at the gas station. He thought it was funny they were selling it there and kind of chuckled when he proudly showed me his purchase. It is now his most favorite food item and accounts for roughly 40% of his diet. (ps. why is beef jerky so expensive?)
Obeying sidewalk signals. Jaywalking isn't illegal or even frowned upon in UK, it's just what you do. Danny still struggles with this one. We've been practicing.
7/11 pizza. This is pretty sick. Did you know 7/11 sells $5 ready-made pizza that they somehow magically heat up in the store? When Danny had friends in town for our wedding we lived way too close to 7/11 and way too far from anything substantial so over-processed pizza was abused...a lot. It was kind of a joke at first, like "hey look we're in America and we're being fat!" until it wasn't a joke anymore and it was real life. I still feel bad about that.
Carpool lane. Nonexistent in the UK. Text from Danny a week after he moved to America: "I'm going to lunch with your parents. We're driving in the carpool lane!!!!!"
Hot dogs at baseball game. Danny's one true wish at his first baseball game was to get thrown a hot dog in the stands from a hot dog vendor. Our seats were up incredibly high because we are cheap and we almost starved to death waiting for a vendor to come up into the rafters. We spent multiple innings ignoring the game (nothing new here for me) because we were busy verbally harassing the vendors from afar. Look up here god dammit, we were saying through clenched teeth, eyes like daggers at the back of their blue shirts. We gave up at inning 7.
Honorable mentions: Danny continues to be in awe of our expansive cereal aisle in the supermarket and the large section dedicated solely to peanut butter. He also can't get over the fact that we have drive-thru bank ATMs.